Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Harmony


It’s early in the morning I can’t sleep and as I sit here in the dark I am reflecting on where we have been, where we are now and where we hopefully to be in the future.

When we first got married, we were in union with each other. We moved together never veering too far nor to close to each other. Always in unison, the same speed and distance. We were navigating through life as one unit.
 
As time went on our movement was no loner the same speed. Sometimes we moved at different speeds and our space got either closer or farther apart. If it got closer, it was because we were arguing and trying to wrestle control from each other. If our space was drifting apart that was because one or both of us was building walls to keep the other apart, not talking to each other, just doing our own thing. As the years went along, the drifting apart or the collisions of being too close was happening with greater frequency and with greater violence.

After some near catastrophic collisions and drifting apart, I knew I had to do something to retrieve what we had. I researched the internet and what I found was DD. When we were test-driving it, we found that it had the power to correct our speed so we were at the correct distance and speed so that we could move as one unit. We also found out that if we used it wrong it would separate us even farther apart than we were before.
 
After some trial and error, we found that only one person could set the speed and distance for their spouse. He is the controller or navigator sitting in the center The spouse is on the outer edge far enough to be on her own but close enough to see how fast and in what direction he is going so that she can adjust herself accordingly and to be ever watchful of events coming into their sphere of influence.

The HOH navigates through life’s terrain through his speed he may choose to go faster or slower depending on how rough the road is. He sets the distance between himself and her knowing that his wife needs time and space from him so that she can grow and think for herself but he also knows that he has to keep her close enough to protect her and be watchful for trouble ahead.

When done properly, it can be a beautiful dance for an outsider to watch as two people move with such speed and precision always as if they are one unit.
 
Bob

28 comments:

  1. It surely does become a peaceful road ahead when DD is introduced and patiently paced to create unison in a relationship.
    Nice post Bob :)
    ~ MrBBSpanker

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  2. Hi MRBBSpanker

    Yes when it is working it is so peaceful.

    Bob

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  3. Well put Bob. It does take trial and error, but it is so worth the effort. When it's done right it is beautiful.

    Hugs,
    PK

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  4. /thanks PK

    Yes when working it can wealyhelp keep the peace but when used wrong boy it takes along time to undue it after the blow up

    Bob

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  5. That is a nice way to put it bob.

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  6. Hi Bob, I love this, very nicely put. It is a beautiful dance when properly paced and it does take trial and error to find the right speed.

    Hugs,
    Roz

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    1. Hi Roz

      I am siting here thinking of the trial and error when we were trying to find the right speed and then about me dancing oh man what a site that was.

      But when you do get it right Wow it will just blow your socks off

      Bob

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  7. Hi Bob,

    Love your post. It is a beautiful thing for someone to watch. So many friends have made comments and asked what our secret is since we have started DD. I just smile and say "respect".
    Kim

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    1. Thank you R&amp for your kind words.

      I like that answer respect that one word says so much

      Bob

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  8. It is a well choreagraphed production, isn't it.

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    1. Hi Sunnygirl

      When both of us are on the same page it can't get any better than that. Oh wait yes it could, she could say Spank me baby WEG

      Bob

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  9. It is a beautiful dance :) Sometimes I wish the steps were easier to learn though!

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    1. Hi Queenie

      As we all know the way to make it look easy is to practice, practice, practice.

      Bob

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  10. The dance is one of my favorite analogies, Bob. I always imagine a lovely, tango, body to body, one moves and the other responds. Its a beautiful image, and it is a lovely comparison for the way we move through life with our partners.

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    1. Hi June

      that it is and so graceful

      Bob

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  11. I just love the way you put this. "far enough to be on her own but close enough to see how fast and in what direction he is going so that she can adjust herself accordingly and to be ever watchful of events coming into their sphere of influence." That is awesome ;)

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  12. Thank you Cathie

    This turned out better than my first post I was trying to use planets and moons as a comparison

    Bob

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  13. Nice way to put it! It can be a bumpy road for sure, but when it's working and you see the difference it makes, it's so worth it! :)

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  14. Hi there Kenzie

    When it is working that is when I never want o go back. It's a win, win situation for the both of us.

    Bob

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  15. We have not DD but all these points can be aplicerade to which vanila marriage whatsoever.
    Communication is the alpha and omega of every relationship.
    Good written, Bob.
    Now I go over and read your FF.

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    1. Hi Mona.

      Yes communication is essential in any relationship

      Bob

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  16. This is beautifully written. Thank you for such great insight.

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    1. Thanks for droping by Summer

      Bob

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