JasonGril from The Taming of the Shrew and I had a meeting of the minds again and have come up with another topic to do a point and counter point for your entertainment. Today’s topic is the pros and cons of Maintenance Spankings. I will be taking the pro and my nemesis (LOL) JasonGirl HERE will be taking the con.
My definition of Maintenance spankings is when a couple, the husband and his wife agree that at certain times whether it be weekly, monthly, daily or whenever the HOH sees the need arise he can give her a spanking.
Now it is written somewhere in the holy DD bible that maintenance spankings are to be at a step below a discipline or punishment spanking. My thoughts are if it brings peace and harmony back to their relationship and that it helps the participating couple it doesn’t matter how hard or soft the spankings are.
Bobbie and I do
I have found that works with Bobbie because during the week she will start to get frustrated with her dad, things going on in her life, people in general, yes as hard as this is to believe she even gets mad at me go figure. When this happens, her demeanor plummets fast, she starts to drift away from US, and she starts to build those walls to keep me out
The purpose of the maintenance spanking is to bring her back to thinking about us, not her or me, and our problem individually but our problems collectively. This gets her away from building walls thinking that she is alone in this. How hard do I spank her depends on how fast I can realize that she is drifting away from me. If I catch it in time it could be just a few swats and if it escalates into something bigger then it will be much longer and at times harder too.
Another good point regarding maintenance spankings is that if you see your spouse acting or doing something that is leading to problems you can nip it in the butt because you are stopping it before it spirals out of control and gets into a bigger mess than it might already be. While you have her undivided attention, you can tell her what you see or hear her doing and you are reassuring her that you are attentive to her needs.
Now, you’re probably saying well if you are going to spank her no matter what, what is the sense of even trying to be good and abide by all the rules and regulations? Being that you are the ones spanked, would you rather have your HOH keep quiet while you head down the road of a serious discipline session or would you rather have him step in and stop it before it went too far? The choice as always is yours.
I would much rather have maintenance versus discipline. I've been finding out that it really does help prevent my mood swings.
ReplyDeleteKim
I have found that the masses are split on maintenance spankings it is about 50/50 from what I have gathered
DeleteBob
We do a combined maintenance-come-everything spanking at least once a week. I just love it! It resets, reconnects, sears my rear! I honestly don't think I could do without it. Naturally I hate it if it turns into, for example, an attitude adjuster, because then it is really painful, but I find that due to these regular sessions, my attitude doesn't need adjusting as often as it did to start with.
ReplyDeleteFor us, it is also a 'learning curve' session. Not only have we steadily (and carefully) tried out a number of different implements, but Starman has learned how to spank with them! He has just realised that the upper thighs and sit spots are like an 'adventure playground' and is learning how to focus in on them.
I also like your description of maintenance being called 'Us' time. I can totally empathise with that. Perhaps that is the most important part of it. Spanking is only a part of what we do, after all.
Hugs
Ami
Hi Ami
DeleteWe call it US time same thing we do it twice a week
Bob
Maintenance is so much better than punishment! We maintenance spankings weekly, for over 3 years now...they work for us!
ReplyDeletehugs abby
Hi abby this what I like so much about this lifestyle you can adapt it to anything you want to make it fit just the two of you
DeleteBob
Bob, you spank Boobie in a preventive purpose, because you know that women-Bobbie, will behave negatively.
ReplyDeleteYou do not know if she could handle week with praise, you punish rather than reward. Bobbie has no chance to avoid spanking, how hard she tries .. Hmmm ...... why, Bob, why do you have so little faith in your Bobbie? Do not you think it weighs her down ... knowing that she will not do on her own?
Say it, like it is: you need to spank her and then you have found the maintance spanking for managing your itchy palms ... lol ..
Ask Bobbie if she would appreciate instead back caress, foot masage, bath with candles .. as "us" time ...
I promise you, she will do anything to get it and behave. But, you have rewarded her, rather than to punish.
Many greetings to Bobbie.
Hello Mona
ReplyDeleteI was starting to think you didn't like me any more because you haven't blessed me with your thoughts of what I wrote in awhile.
Roflol I love the way you pick on me, if you only knew how bad Bobbie really is then you would understand why I have to spank her so much. To let you on a little secret Bobbie likes the US time we have and I can guarantee that no lovable Bobbie of mine is ever hurt when it is or US time :) well maybe just a little.
Bob, I still like you..
DeleteI have read all your blogpost but could not answer .. I had thoughts in another direction.
I'm glad Bobbie enjoy your"US" time. I like that it is pinkich and not reddish.
Try foot massage, you will see what wonders it does .. she will enjoy your"US" time even more ... lol ..
Ooh ML...foot massage sounds wonderful! Matthew used to give me those and I would simply melt! ;)
DeleteMona
DeleteIf you only knew how I pamper the mistreated Bobbie of mine she gets her foot massages on a regular bases and yes she does purrrrrrr very loud LOL
Bob
bob, this is an excellent post. this happens to me a lot and i feel myself slipping (like today for instance). i'm going to read it to my hubby. thanks!
ReplyDeletemaryanne.
thank you Maryanne for thinking the post is good enough to show your husband
DeleteBob
I think maintenance is perfect to "reset" the TiH's mindset. I've suggested it to my own HOH, because I think it will help deter--and during he can point out, "I've noticed you doing this and that, you need to stop"--I'd much rather have a warning/preventative lecture than an after-the-fact lecture.
ReplyDeleteHi Bremma
Deletethis does have it's merits for helping the tih out
Bob
I do not care what they are called, but 'regular attention' or 'us time' relieves tension. Recently I spoke with someone and they could hear a marked difference in my voice after some attention!
ReplyDeleteWhy it helps...Who knows? It does! And we are not even DD.
You just need them on a more regular basis...like once a day...at least! ;)
DeleteLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! Cat!!
DeleteI am with you Minelle call it what you want as long as it works
DeleteBob
I quite agree that special time focused on "us", no matter what it's name is a great stress reliever and can greatly improve mood...spanking on a more regular basis would be nice...not sure about once a day...though sometimes I do wish for it even if just a simple swat as a promise for later... :-)
DeleteHello Trep
DeleteI am amazed by all the names it is called, but it works that is sure
Bob
Hey Bob...whatever you call it, I do believe that non-punishment spankings work well for most couples.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Cat
Hi Cat
Deleteit is a great tool to reset her attitude
Bob
Bob, you know that you can give her reset in so many different ways. made love to her .. what is more "we" than to have sex with each other?
DeleteYou can do something together, where Bobbie must slow down and have time to think over what happens.
Why use a mechanism that most hurts?
Why not make use of pleasure? It does not hurt .. lol.
LOL mona you are so special to me
DeleteI love your first suggestion Mona I wish we could do it more but Walter is home watching waiting for us.
We do things together Mona I spank her that takes two doesn't it LOL
I give her as much pleasure she can stand
Bob
I would much rather get the maintenance spanking than the punishment spanking. With punishment spankings, you also have to deal with the guilt of what you have done until a spanking can happen, you have to ask for forgiveness, you have to repair any damages you have have emotionally or physiclaly caused. A maintenance can save you from this. When your HOH sees you starting to spiral out of control, he can step up and give you the release you need for your emotions before they bottle up into something dangerous. We women tend to build up stress, thinking we can handle everything, and then taking on more than we can handle trying to satify the nurturer in us to take care of everyone else. Sometimes we just need to be saved from ourselves. It's wonderful, when an HOH can come to us in love, and tell us that it's time to let go, let it all out, and let him catch us. A maintenance is a great way to achieve this. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Es Nay
DeleteYes it cab be a great way to bring every thing back to normal before it becomes a big problem
Bob
This is an awesome post, i'm going to share it with Colin because we've been going back and forth with maintenance for a bit. I love how you call it "us time."
ReplyDeleteHi Kenzie
DeleteHope it works out with you and Colin after you show him this
Bob
Hi Bob. I've just found your blog (I know, I know...I'm not sure how I missed it). "Maintenance"...grrr...the word makes me crazy but the thoughts behind it are the mainstay of what we do. It used to be very organized on specific days each week. Then it moved to a couple times a week when he saw fit. It is a bit more random now, mostly because I have this need for a reason. It's always changing...which works for us.
ReplyDeleteWelcome Susie glad you found me :)
ReplyDeleteI agree with you Susie call it what you will or how often you want the main thing is it works
Bob