Monday, September 29, 2014

We're Back




We're Back

It has been eight long months since I have written a post in my blog and I thought I would write what has been happening to us. Where we have been; where we are; and where we hope to be in the future. This is going to be a new journey for me to try to tell a story of how we have gotten to where we are now.

I stopped writing because I thought I had said all that I wanted to say without sounding condescending or like I had all the answers. Plus Bobbie’s dad has taken more of our time and I found it hard to concentrate on what I wanted to write about so I let it slide. Saying to myself I’ll get to it next week and when that week came and went, I promised myself again next week. Well 32 weeks later I think I have something to say, well for a bit anyway. lol.

My fil has taken a bunch of our time because he needs our assistance more now than he ever has. And that in itself has been a challenge to us. He has broken up our time so much that we couldn’t plan anything for ourselves. As much as I hate to say this, there have been times that he has been a burden because he is in your face all the time. He can’t go anywhere without our assistance and because like the rest of us when he wants something he wants it now.

His needs are different than ours. When we want to relax, he wants something to eat. When we watch TV, he changes the channels to watch his program. He needs our attention on so many different levels that we don’t have time for “US”. But on the other side of the coin he is a blessing because as I have stated before he has and continues to amaze me with his knowledge and kindness (most of the time). He, still to this day, teaches me new things about myself and our relationship. How to look at things differently. How to be more compassionate to others and not to be so quick with my anger.

During that time we have gotten (looking for a word to describe it) not real busy, not running around but lazy, yes lazy, we kept putting it off trying to get “US” time in. We had become complacent. We started to drift our own way. But then one day while having coffee waiting for fil to wake up so we can give him his breakfast, we got started talking about our DD relationship. She asked me if I missed it and I said yes I did and she said that she missed it too. 

So here I am (we are) writing again. How long will this last? Haven’t a clue but hopefully you will be entertained and that someday you might find something that could help you in your walk with your spouse or if you happen to leave a reply, you all could give me something new to help us out.
 
Bob

35 comments:

  1. I am glad you are back. DD does take a conscious effort it seems. I hope that the time with your fil is filled with lots more good. US time is hard to find with all my kids around, so I kinda know how it is. Welcome back.

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    1. Thank you Blondie for your kind words

      I am sure that he will bring many more teachings to us and give me more ideas for some stories lol

      Bob

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  2. Hey there Bob, welcome back.

    Honestly I'm not really doing as much these days in the online DD world either. Though I miss not being around as much, I've made my peace with it. I'd say focus on getting you and Bobbie's DD back where you want it, and do the online stuff as much as you can or have the inclination for, no more.

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    1. Hi Foothills

      we have never really left each other it was just no time for us but now we are back on track
      Bob

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  3. So happy you are back! I/we also just dealt with a situation like yours. It's challenging and rewarding.
    Hope to hear more about you guys soon.

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    1. Hi Minelle

      thank you for the warm welcome back.

      Bob

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  4. Glad to have you back.....we all have times when life gets busy and we have to let some things go by the wayside.....
    hugs abby

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  5. Very happy to see you back. I've been here so long I've said all there is to say three or four time and I'm still farbling on about it. I know how much it take out of you to care for elderly parents or in-laws, worth it, but NOT easy. I hope you can fine some DD time, I know you would benefit from it.

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    1. Thank you PK it is good to be back and yes we still do dd but not as much as we would like

      Bob

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  6. Hello Bob, good to see you about again.

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    1. Thank you DelFonte for the rewelcome

      Bob

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  7. Welcome back Bob...happy to see you again. Looking forward to reading more about how you and Bobbie find some DD time.

    Hugs and Blessings...
    Cat

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    1. Hi Cat

      I think we have some interesting stories to tell and thank you for the warm welcome

      Bob

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  8. Replies
    1. Hi The Wife

      Lol I have a cheering group now yaaaaay
      Bob

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  9. Welcome back Bob! It4 great to see you back and hope to hear more from you soon :) Life does have a habit of taking over at times. It has for us too. Hope you and Bobbie do manage to find some alone time.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Hi Roz

      We now have a handle on our time management for the moment and will be talking about them soon
      Bob

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  10. Welcome back to the blogging side of things :) I can empathize with your situation completely!
    You may have been away from here for a while, but as many know, your assistance to this community has never completely waned. Your help in moderating a chat room elsewhere has brought so many people much needed assistance and solace. I know I am indebted to you and the other Mods for your dedication to the entire community there.
    Respectfully,
    MrBB

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    1. Hi MRBBSpanker

      Thank you for your kind words and your chat room it has helped us to stay on course even when I wasn't writing anymore.
      The people in chat help have helped Bobbie and I to stay focused on each other.

      Bob

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  11. Bob, Finally!! I've been wondering where you've been, and I'm so glad to see you're still thinking and dreaming DD!!! For we in the DD world need to draw from your incredible DD experience and knowledge!! I'm gonna sleep better knowing I can now turn to your blogs again when I'm messing my own DD experience up!! I missed you and that wonderful TIH of yours!!!
    Pippi

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    1. Hi pippi
      omg thank you for the very high marks, for once I am speechless. Lmbo

      Bob

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  12. Welcome back, Bob and Bobbie.
    I have thought of you often .. and hoping that all is well with you all three.

    Not having time for US time .. I know all about it. No FIL here at home, but three children of different ages and different daily pattern .

    Take care,
    Mona Lisa.

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    1. Hello Mona
      I to have thought of you, laughing about some of the questions you before I disappeared
      and hopefully will continue to ask.

      Bob

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  13. I'm so happy to see you back!! You both really are inspirations to many of us in our new journey into DD. With bloggers like yourself, we can find new ways to navigate the minefield life lays in the way of our US time. Being caregivers to aging parents is a rewarding but very time-consuming undertaking. I learn from my MIL daily but do often begrudge the usurping of my time and talents when I really want to be doing something else entirely. I wouldnt change how things are, just as you have said about your situation, but I do have to remind myself of that at times.

    We only have so much time here and sometimes it feels like everyone else has decided where and how mine should be spent. I love US time with SK and want more of it, too. We sneak as much in as we can and will continue to try to avoid the pitfalls that would steal away our joy.

    You are the best Bob and Bobbie. I'm glad to get the chance to receive your words of wisdom once again. THE FORCE BE WITH YOU!!!

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    1. Hi Britany Texas

      With a comment like that how do I respond to it?
      I am keeping quiet and smiling like a loon after reading what you said
      Thank you

      Bob

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  14. I have missed reading about a DD dynamic that isn't based chiefly on spanking punishments. Also, since my husband and I have been in the same rut as your temporary one for several years now, I'm encouraged by the fact that it doesn't have to last forever if you want it to change.

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    1. Hello Disciplined Love

      The good news is it doesn't last forever but the bad news is you have to be proactive in getting back on the horse.

      Bob

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  15. Yayyy! So happy to see you back! Miss you guys tons!

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    1. Hi Kenzie

      It is good to be back I have missed everyone

      Bob

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  16. Bob...,Life is so short and having family around does make things difficult when it comes to DD...But if you have learned from this, then you have another chapter in your DD lifestyle that you can use in the future,,,Look at things from this experience as a learning tool..there was a reason for you not writing not just because of your fil...look at what you said.,,,"I'm back"..,.Use what you have learned and apply it to your DD lifestyle.,.,,Welcome back..

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    1. Hi GMD

      Thank you for your word of encouragement. I am sure when this chapter in our life ends we will be sadden but we will have a lot of memories that we can learn from.

      Bob

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  17. Welcome back Bob! It must have been a relief to hear Bobbie say that she missed it too!

    Best of Luck to you!
    willie

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    1. Hi Wilma Rubble

      I have turned Bobbie to the dark side and she is almost as bad as me about spankings lol

      Bob

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