Male Support

One thing that I think that makes this DD lifestyle so great is the support network that is available to the community. Whenever a sub/tih has a problem she has access to many different types of support groups from web pages of other likeminded people waiting to help their fellow sisters figure out her problems. There are blogs that talk about their problems and friends that she made along the way that she can either call, email, pm even Skype to talk about what is on their minds. To brain storm what is going on in their relationship and how to figure out their problems.

On the other hand the HOH/Dom by his own design has no such support group. If he is lucky enough to have a male friend that he is close to in this lifestyle he could choose to talk to him and most of the time he chooses to goes it alone.

Why is it that women have this huge choice of support groups and the men have hardly any support group to refer to? My theory is that women are a social group. They like to be in contact with other people and easily express their hopes, dreams, and etc. I would also say it is possibly the mother instinct in them that wants to care and nurture the person they care about, to make them happy in whatever was making them sad.

On the opposite end of the scale the men are loners, predators, territorial creatures protecting what is theirs. He is skeptical. Ever watchful of the next male coming into his territory to make sure what is his stays his. As he grew up, he was taught that talking about his problems is a sign of weakness that can be used against him or even lower his status in the group he runs with. 

The options for the male are slim. He could start researching the internet looking for answers to his problems and this is a good resource but time consuming. He can start a blog and talk through his problems that way and remain anonymous with very few people knowing who he is with some hope to get good feedback so he can get ideas on what to do. (This has turned out to be an invaluable asset for me because you have greeted me with open arms taking me at face value that I was sincere. For this you have my highest respect, and you have helped me with your comments more than you will ever know.)

He could go into a chat room asking questions without knowing if the person he talking to is real or not or, his best bet is if he has someone who he looks up to, his equal or a mentor perhaps? He could talk to him asking for advice and trusting him not to be judged but still seen as an equal trying to solve his problem.

Until we can start opening up and trusting some people making close friends that could possibly be part of our support group, we men will continue to be loners scratching our heads trying to solve problems that might have been solved already by someone else.