Friday, September 6, 2013
About Last Post
I am writing this in regards to my last post. It seems that I have upset some people with its contents and may have lead others to believe that I practice what was posted.
I posted that article because I don’t spank Bobbie for discipline anymore because of the negative feedback that I got from her the few times we have tried it. The reason we don’t practice this method anymore is because instead of helping her to forgive herself or release some pent up stress that she may have had she goes into a deep depression type state. She doesn’t talk to me for a couple of days and while spanking her she fights it.
So I resorted to an alternative type discipline that consists of taking away her things that are dear to her. For example her books, her computer, her electronics, I also have her write essays on different subjects that help her to understand why she did or does was wrong,
She sits on the bed instead of doing corner time where she has had good success with thinking about what she has done; she has done some extra chores as discipline too. I do not do anything to her that we have not already discussed nor tested out before hand of implementing anything new into our life style.
As for the articles that I put on the blog that other people have written, I may or may not agree with what they have written, I put it on my blog because I think that it would be interesting to read and informative. It puts a different spin on the subject and the result is that I hope you find it entertaining and possibly learn something new from it. I do not say anything about these articles because I want you to form your own opinion.
Bob
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Hi Bob,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you felt you had to post this. When I read your previous post I recognised that you were publishing an article 'as is' and that you didn't comment as to your own thoughts on it, or whether or not you use some of the practices included in it.
While I didn't necessarily agree with everything in the article. I found it interesting to read others ideas. As we know, we are not all the same and each couple needs to find what works for them.
I also just want to say I think it is wonderful that you don't use any method of discipline without discussing it and trying it out first.
Hugs,
Roz
Hello Roz
DeleteThank you for your support and the calming words of wisdom
Bob
Bob,
ReplyDeleteDon't worry what anyone thinks but Bobbie. I felt it was obvious in your post that you were sharing many different methods used by many different people. As for me, and for Bobbie I suspect, some of these I would accept and some I would not. Bobbie and I both have husbands who would respect that. For things like mouth soaping, I wouldn't accept it, yet I like reading it in fiction stories. Aren't our minds strange. Just keep writing.
Thank you PK for your calming words and I just found out my amour is not as thick as I thought lol.
DeleteBob
"I do not say anything about these articles because I want you to form your own opinion."
ReplyDeleteYou did, Bob, you did.
I'm sorry if I have misunderstood that it was something that you stand behind.
I'm so new to all this so I'm very 'green' and can not see between the lines.
I apologize for that.
After reading this blog post, I love Bobbie even more. (and of course you too .. lol ..)
Greetings Mona
DeleteNo I am not upset with you, how could I ever be mad at a person that makes me smile and laugh at myself after you respond to one of my post.
You inspire me to be better because of your questions that you ask me.
Bob
Bob, I'm curious, how Bobbie reacts to punishment whatsoever.
ReplyDeleteIf punishment spanking makes her depresiv, do not do that other punishments too?
Is her depresivitet connected direct to punishments, or is it just for some with the pain?
I would love to read her thoughts about this.
Can not you persuade her to write, or to tell you about this?
Hi Mona
DeleteShe is going to write a post for you Mona, you have gotten her to do something that even I have a hard time doing and that is getting her to post.
Bob
I too thought it was obvious in your previous post that you don't practice it. But even if you did, it is This Thing WE Do~ the WE is between the two partners not the community at large. Consent is key...if the partners both agree, who are we to say it is wrong....although *shudder* for some of them for me. Good thing I am such an angel, Barney has nothing to worry about >>>LOL
ReplyDeletewillie
Hello Wilma
DeleteThank you for reminding me that the other only person I should be concerned about is Bobbie and no one else.
Bob
I don't think that anyone's understanding of "it", DD, (or whatever label you choose to give it) is automatically lessened by the fact that they happen to practise it in the way that is right for them. In any case what exactly *is* "it" if it isn't whatever is right and connective for the couple concerned?. All that you really need to qualify as someone whose opinion and thoughts are worth something is an understanding of how this thing works and what positives it can bring to a relationship. If anything, the fact that you are prepared to discount the disciplinary spanking around which so many people seem to think the whole thing revolves, because it's not the right tool for Bobbie, is an indication that you have a possibly have a more advanced understanding of how it works emotionally.
ReplyDeleteObviously, I can't speak for Bobbie or her feelings or life experiences, but I did once know a couple who experienced something that sounds similar. In this case, the wife was spanked as a child and the experience was one she associated with dislike, disapproval and a feeling that she wasn't good or worthy enough. The way that she described this made me feel that she knew that it wasn't intended that way, but that it was still how it affected her.
When she got married, she was quite comfortable for her husband to lead and give her spankings of the erotic or even reminder/maintenance/role affirmation varieties, all of which only made her feel loved. Nor did she mind being lovingly disciplined or guided by him in other ways, but when it came to disciplinary spankings, all those childhood negative associations came rushing back and created a barrier of misunderstanding and difficulty between them. In short, even though she knew they were given in love, disciplinary spankings didn't make her *feel* loved.
Very good post. Kudos to Bob and Bobbie, that them openly talking about Boobie react negatively to punishment spanking. I mean, it must surely find other women whoalso react that way, but where are they? Why nobody talks about it? All just talk about how positive thing it is to get a sore butt, that they feel loved.
DeleteI am one who feels that punishment makes me feel me like a last thing on the Earth. Offended. Unworthy, a poor woman who needs to be punished to get better because I am such a wretched woman that I can not do it on my own. I feel unloved.
But give my fun and foreplay spanking anytime ... lol .. preferably every day.
Thank you Mona
DeleteI don't know were this journey is going to take us but I am sure it is going to be very interesting and intertaining writing
Bob
Hey Bob :) I never thought you were writing about your personal practices, but even if you were, I wouldn't have a problem with anything you described as long as Bobbie had consented. I personally wouldn't consent to everything in your previous post, but I would to several of them. TTWD is exactly that, and when a couple finds those things that work for THEM, then it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Thanks for presenting some ideas to those who may be interested in learning new alternatives.
ReplyDeleteGood morning Queenie
DeleteYes you are so right, now I have to remember it lol
Bob
Bob I totally understood your post as well! We should all be able to discuss ideas and practices. I think you and Bobbie seem like a great couple!
ReplyDeleteHello there Minelle
DeleteThank you for stopping by and leaving a comment, it has been a while since we have said hi to each other.
Bob
Bob, even if you totally agreed with every single said in the article, it isn't anyone's position to judge if both you and Bobbie have agreed on any or all punishments. It's what works and is agreed upon by the two of you. I myself wouldn't like the mouth soaping or kneeling on rice, but I do not think it is wrong for couples who find this to be a good and non abusive deterant for the wife. I am sorry you felt judged, and that you had to write this. I understood that you were only sharing an article as it was written.
ReplyDeleteHello Es May.
DeleteThank you for stopping by and leaving a comment and what you have said is so true and sometimes we lose sight of the most important person who we should be listening to is our spouse and not what was said or thought was said on your post.
Bob
I think it is sad that you have to defend your post. I know everyone has their own thoughts but I have to stick with the thinking to not knock it till you try it. I think it has great info in it can that it runs as a base line for everyone to build off of for their own needs. Any ways good post and say hi to Bobbie for me lol.
ReplyDeleteWelcome buterfly
DeleteThank you for posting and leaving comit
Bob